28 December 2009


A friend realized something rather amusing yet enlightening. He became a more forgiving person when he realized that he had been letting himself off again and again, readily forgiving himself for his own misdeeds to others big and small, while being easily unforgiving and grudge-bearing towards others for their little mistakes. He realized how fat his ego was. It was as if he alone had all the right in the world to be wrong and forgiven, while the rest of the world should do him no slight wrong.

Being a forgiving person is part of the path of practice towards Enlightenment. Forgiveness liberates both pain and guilt. It unties knots of tensed negative karma, stops ill seeds from growing into greater hatred. Being unforgiving is nurturing our sense of hatred.

However, forgiving another does not mean we allow the same wrong to be repeated. We have to realize that while it could be our negative karma that we are wronged, we should put in the effort to prevent the person who did us wrong from doing more harm, creating more negative karma for himself. By being complacent, we could well be creating more negative karma for ourselves! Remember - forgiveness is "for giving". It is a gift of reassurance - it sets both parties' hearts and minds at peace.